Adam attends a regular day care three days a week. There are no "special" kids. Every day I drop him off and walk him into school. He is tiny compared to the other kids and I say goodbye until I come back 8 hours later.
Each day I get the same report: He does not eat lunch or much of a snack with the other kids, and really doesn't nap well.
When we pick him up, other kids talk to me. They say "Hi" to me and say "goodbye Adam" and usually tell me random things "Do you like my sparkly shoes?" "My name is Ashley" "What's yours?" I respond and smile and ask them questions, but I am always left thinking that that's what Adam is supposed to be like. I have to talk to myself and say "No. this is him. this is what he is supposed to be. "
Sometimes I feel angry and sometimes I feel sad. Sometimes it is just easier to stay away from "normal" kids. (We've been able to do that for 2 years) I also can't/don't eat lunch with other people at work who have toddlers who are normal- it's hard for me to chit chat. Hard to hear complaints, hard to always have to answer the regular "How is he? Is he getting better?" questions.
It's easier to avoid people and live on my own special ed island.
School is rough.